How Truth Changes Shape

maybe it is because people hurt me too much and for numerous of times with each time got more intense, so when I got hurt, I put thicker walls around me to protect me if there's a sudden attack from the outside world, like those fort blankets you used to built when you were kid, it was a place where you felt so safe, the only place, although these walls are thicker and tougher and hard to break. I cried today. it was the first time I cried in front of people, in public, the first time I felt so small and tired and thin... and most of all... fragile. I always feel so tough, you know. tougher than any of the girls that I know and I think I still do, it was the only weakest point that I let people see. I cried on the inside you see... meaning that I cried, but I do it when I'm alone.


I feel so xxxxxxx and tired. you would say that I brag too much or just so fvcking ungrateful, but really... I do feel that way. I mean how can you feel grateful when you had opened your veil and told the whole world your pain and showed the whole world the weakest point of you, and still the world doesn't even see you with the corners of their eyes. it's like they just don't care. any bit. not even a single bit. single pixel-looking bit. no no no, the whole world chose to close their eyes and open them when they need it. the whole world still thinks that I'm not even in their goddamnTop Ten Priorities list. I'm tired. take me home now.