Is It?

Is it wrong to feel lonely in the middle of people?

Last night I attended an event with my friends, mostly girls, but there were testosterones attended the event too. The event was stacked with pretty people who wore pretty attires that resembled like those in the 60s and early 70s era, when the flare jeans, colorful button-down shirts, gypsy headbands and uncountable beaded-bracelets were the hippest things you could and should wear. Drawn-flowers and drawn-peace-signs were everywhere. Colourful lightnings, finger foods and hot drinks could be found everywhere.The weather was cold but nothing could prevent the smiles that were spreading like cheap perfumes under hot daylight. I watched people around me throwing their heads, swaying their hips, drawing their endless stock of cigarettes and jumping, at the same time the music never stopped playing.
It was then I felt it.
It was when I was in the middle of people, an unrecognizable song was blasting over the speaker, bright light was all around me and some of my friends were unrecognizable, I felt that I was lonely. My head was dizzy with the realization and revelation that I'm in here all alone. But being alone was nothing if you compare it with being lonely. The loneliness feeling was a full blow and with the cold weather, then I did nothing but plant a wide smile and a pair of eyes that twinkle.
And then it was time to slow dance, it made the loneliness intensified. But the kind of loneliness that intensified was only the one that caused by love, by affection, something that you feel when you don't have someone you share your love with, while the first one, it was profound, utter, inevitable feeling that first found in your gut, that caused that pang of void in your heart and soul, it was there, lying in the dark. It was what I felt. It was what I felt all night. It was something that I wish I could avoid. I have always felt that incurable loneliness feeling in the middle of people in an event. Do you sometimes feel that too?

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