Zahira Part I
She shone a smile to everyone. Her eyes twinkled beautifully, hearing people say things around her. She occasionally laughed when they laughed. Sometimes she also commented their gossips and talks, although from time to time she glanced around the room because she didn't know what they were talking or because she just didn't want to participate in the conversations. After her companions and her exchanged goodbyes, she went back to her own apartment. When she was safe within the brick walls of her loft, she broke down into tears. The tears streamed down fast and were hot to her cheeks, she laughed bitterly between sobs.
Tonight was the bachelorette party for her dear older sister and she was the pointed host. She decided the party was themed as scavenger's hunt because they went to one club to another, dancing until their feet hurt. The last place they visited las night was a 24-hours coffee shop and they talked their hearts out while sobering up with some coffee.
It all started with her sister's best friend spotted one of her childhood crush in the coffee shop and they all went frenzy. They talked about their childhood crushes but focused on her sister's love life, like ow fortunate and lucky her sister was for having a guy she always wanted to be with and how great her sister's love life was. She smiled to all of her sister's friends, looking somewhat knowingly and understandingly, when deep down inside her soul she felt sour throbbing ache.
She never had a boyfriend. She was in her early twenties and she never had one while her sister had her first and only boyfriend already had one when she was eight. She had never tasted any love, while her sister always had. She felt sick. She felt unloved.
After she gave away bitter laughs, she cleaned herself up, drank some water and dragged herself to bed.
She woke up after lunch with a bit headache here and there. She straightened herself up and went to the bathroom. When she finished dressing up, she went to her sofa in the living room. She stared at her furnitures and started to think about all of her sister's friends' comments last night.
"Your sister was the Prom Queen, the Homecoming Queen, and lots of other."
"He truly is her soulmate, she wanted him, he wanted her, she loves him, he loves her and now they are marrying each other."
"Hey! Don't talk like I'm not here, but it's true, he's my soulmate."
"Of course you both are soulmate, you finally be with each other legally. I mean... you've been with each other since when? Thirteen? What you both have is far more than love and magic."
She bit her lip. Her head was killing her, not because of physical pain, but her own mind. Her own mind was making her numb, she hated it. She cried again and wanted to scream her lungs out. Everything hurt her then. She wanted to cease to exist. She was by no means ugly, her cousins assured her that, but noone had ever called her pretty either. She was not the smartest girl of the school either, let alone her own age. She felt like she had no personal noticeable trademarks. She was normal noone, she could blend unnoticeable in the middle of the sea of people. Sometimes she used it as advantages, often she didn't think about it, but on occasions, especially right now, she felt like it was the most fucked up thing in the world.
Her sobs began to decrease. Her eyes gained clearer sight. Her throat was sore and there was a sickening feeling inside her nose. She sighed and went to the bathroom to splash some water on her face. She stared at her reflection on the bathroom mirror.
"My only true friend is my own reflection." she whispered.
The next day at her sister's reception, she sat at one of the chairs, watching people happily dancing with each other.
"Are you happy?" came a voice behind her.
Tonight was the bachelorette party for her dear older sister and she was the pointed host. She decided the party was themed as scavenger's hunt because they went to one club to another, dancing until their feet hurt. The last place they visited las night was a 24-hours coffee shop and they talked their hearts out while sobering up with some coffee.
It all started with her sister's best friend spotted one of her childhood crush in the coffee shop and they all went frenzy. They talked about their childhood crushes but focused on her sister's love life, like ow fortunate and lucky her sister was for having a guy she always wanted to be with and how great her sister's love life was. She smiled to all of her sister's friends, looking somewhat knowingly and understandingly, when deep down inside her soul she felt sour throbbing ache.
She never had a boyfriend. She was in her early twenties and she never had one while her sister had her first and only boyfriend already had one when she was eight. She had never tasted any love, while her sister always had. She felt sick. She felt unloved.
After she gave away bitter laughs, she cleaned herself up, drank some water and dragged herself to bed.
She woke up after lunch with a bit headache here and there. She straightened herself up and went to the bathroom. When she finished dressing up, she went to her sofa in the living room. She stared at her furnitures and started to think about all of her sister's friends' comments last night.
"Your sister was the Prom Queen, the Homecoming Queen, and lots of other."
"He truly is her soulmate, she wanted him, he wanted her, she loves him, he loves her and now they are marrying each other."
"Hey! Don't talk like I'm not here, but it's true, he's my soulmate."
"Of course you both are soulmate, you finally be with each other legally. I mean... you've been with each other since when? Thirteen? What you both have is far more than love and magic."
She bit her lip. Her head was killing her, not because of physical pain, but her own mind. Her own mind was making her numb, she hated it. She cried again and wanted to scream her lungs out. Everything hurt her then. She wanted to cease to exist. She was by no means ugly, her cousins assured her that, but noone had ever called her pretty either. She was not the smartest girl of the school either, let alone her own age. She felt like she had no personal noticeable trademarks. She was normal noone, she could blend unnoticeable in the middle of the sea of people. Sometimes she used it as advantages, often she didn't think about it, but on occasions, especially right now, she felt like it was the most fucked up thing in the world.
Her sobs began to decrease. Her eyes gained clearer sight. Her throat was sore and there was a sickening feeling inside her nose. She sighed and went to the bathroom to splash some water on her face. She stared at her reflection on the bathroom mirror.
"My only true friend is my own reflection." she whispered.
The next day at her sister's reception, she sat at one of the chairs, watching people happily dancing with each other.
"Are you happy?" came a voice behind her.